Guess what I just figured out? Yep, you didn’t know did you? Well I figured out the ONLY thing that gets me down. Girls, period! It’s only girls! HOLY FREAKIN’ CRAP! I mean, that’s why I was always happy even back when I was getting bullied and made fun of all day long day after day. This is why I was only frustrated when stuff in the club was going haywire and not ever down or blue about it. Has anyone ever noticed that the times when I’ve been happiest are the ones where I’m in love?

I guess if you count before college so no women in my life really, I was doing well because I thought that when I was 18 I could just call up a girl and ask her to marry me. I was a total dumbass and huge idealist until I had the world introduced to me starting in 10th grade. That changed everything. You could also note that going to college did me in and then my recent relationship/breakup was probably the biggest learning portion in my life. So crazy! No wonder. Everything makes so much sense now in my life, all of it!

As an example, this would explain why once I visited a certain person December 2007 why I came back as a completely different person than when I left and from then on, I was changing more and more toward a greatness in my personality which is something I don’t seem to be able to accomplish without a shared life experience. Kinda sad and pathetic. Well everyone’s different somehow and this is my way.
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So does anyone else I know like bluegrass? Maybe they’d listen to it but aren’t as active about it as I would be. I need to get a hold of more of it. I really really like bluegrass, but who knows how much. I seem to associate bluegrass strictly with Bela Fleck and some other random things like the song Daddy Got Bass and some Bluegrass Student Union stuff; although, they’re a barbershop group so it’s a bit different but still Bluegrass all the same.

I found a love for it senior year of high school and haven’t really put it down ever since. I wish I could get involved with it more, but I don’t know anyone else that’s remotely interested in it. I’m sure if you saw me drivin’ down the road playing some bluegrass and jammin’ out you’d be saying to yourself “what the heck is wrong w/ this guy?” Well let’s hope I find someone interested in the genre soon!

I was talking to Nick tonight and showing him for OkCupid questions and making fun of some of them and kinda putting out that there’s no way I can answer this question because my answer does not exist in the choices or that the question assumes something or just a bunch of other testing no-nos that whoever wrote those questions isn’t realizing when they’re writing them. Oh yeah, and how some questions make no difference, at least to me, on relationships like something asking what finger you’d want to lose if you have to. That question means NOTHING. That’s one of those questions that’s supposed to make you think about yourself and not take things for granted. Seriously people!

So I asked Nick, from what he knew of me, what would he say. And here’s what he said:

hmm, it’s hard to tell. I would tend to agree with what you said. I would say you like the way bigger cities are more than small towns, but even though they’re pretty different from each other, you still like both

it seems like it’s hard for me to say anything for sure one way or the other for most things. the answer usually seems to be “both” for you, haha

I guess because it seems like you can enjoy things either way, even for different reasons

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In another one of my Dream Girl-style posts, I will say, I absolutely hate drama girls. Get out of my life now and leave me alone. Too bad that if I get involved with my said Dream Girl, she might have– Wait a sec! She’s my dream girl. This is good. She won’t have drama girls that’ll screw up the love life, and no one’s perfect, but she’s not gonna be a drama girl. She’ll be understanding and work through things they was you should do it. She might also take some time to get to know me and my past (as I would do to her) so she’ll not just sit there and assume stupid things about me or judge me.

Still, I’m going to think more and more as to how explaining myself as still a child at heart is the absolute best method of understanding me completely. Heck, if a girl’s gonna fall in love with me, she really should know that. It’ll be like part of the contract or something. Too bad all of this probably sounds creepy, but if Dream Girl saw it, she’d not have an issue with it. Again, there’s no way that’ll happen and have her be the Dream Girl. Yet again, she does not exist.

I’ll just be over here digging myself into a deeper hole.
– Kevin out

So finally, I had someone do to me what I’ve done. It’s not really begging so much as asking enough until someone says what I wanted them to.
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Ok, this is becoming a bit outrageous, but maybe it’ll be come a theme of this blog and attract visitors. Hey, whatever gets me to write right? Get it? It was a play on the word right and write because they–

And so what it looks like is I’m trying to pull a girl from IPv6 addresses in IPv4 addresses and not counting any behind NAT routers because they’re almost all the same. It’ll be tough to find an IPv4 address NOT 192.168.0.0 or 172.16.0.0 or 10.0.0.0 or even 169.254.0.0 if I’m THAT unlucky. What I’m looking for is an IPv6 address living in an IPv4 world. Someone like me I guess? Lol. I think it’s more like someone that understands me and would also be weird enough to surprise the crap outta me all the time.
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So I wonder, since I stated that I don’t abide by Murphy’s Law, then that means I should be able to find this dream girl whenever I feel like it. So I say I will find her by the end of this month, then it’ll happen. Heck, I knew I’d meet someone new August 10th and it happened. So maybe the same’ll happen again this month.

I actually think something magical will happen on my birthday. That date this year is a big deal to me now. Not because I was born then, but because it’s a way for me to be reminded of my stupidity. Nah, maybe not. It’s just a day in my life that, for once, reminds me of something. It means something to me. The something of how I never told anyone when it was, not even my girlfriend. I feel like I did something wrong now that it’s all over. I can’t keep blaming myself, but I want to just say goodbye at least. To say sorry, thank you, and have that final goodbye. I’d prefer it to be in person, but I can do it even through writing. It should be before my birthday that I decide to finally let go so that this dream girl can come into my life. I have not somehow push myself toward that goal though. Murphy’s Law isn’t prevented without any sort of action on my part.

Any ideas?
– Kevin out

Well after doing a comparison of headsets, I have another predicament. The convenience of using the headphones that came w/ it shows that my old ones, while far more uncomfortable, are a heck of a lot better sounding with good bass. The other ones are really clear in the treble and don’t cancel out external noise as much which is great if I’m in my car and talking to someone on one headphone, but I dunno. It just doesn’t make for as good of sound, but great for talking to someone in a quick conversation.
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Ok, I’m sold. I don’t care if I’m at work, I need to write this up. I am using my Diamond today after playing around w/ it all weekend. I didn’t bring the headphones because I didn’t think I’d need them. Stupid idea. But that brings me to writing this post.
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Got my new phone today. The Spring htc TOUCH Diamond. It says htc INNOVATION on the side of the phone so that’s what I refer to it as since that’s a lot easier to say, and I like it better.

Next up, Demetri Martin is a self-made genius. Wow. I watched something of his and realize I did the same kind of stuff. I create needless challenges for myself and make games out of things so I become interested in them. He was also talking about a lot of other stuff I could relate to, but it seems like he was actually able to accomplish a lot rather than just wanting to do something really bad but failing to do so like me. Well I eventually seem to be able to do all of the stuff I’ve always wanted to do at some point in time, but it’s never always as I dreamed.

After that paragraph, I was gonna write something thoughtful, but I’d forgotten what it was.
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Why oh why oh why do I always look back on the past and remember the good times and the good things. Most ppl remember only the bad things about people and bad things people have done yet, I seem to be only able to remember good things for the most part. This is probably why I don’t hold grudges. Now, if it was a bad experience, I’ll probably not remember good things, lol, but for the most part, I end up only remembering good things. It really sucks. Dream Girl, where are you! lol.

I wonder, if I make a post asking for a dream girl, will be magically appear? It’s such a stupid idea, and no one would think it would be possible, but then I would do it just to spite them. I would wanna prove that it’s possible because that’s a challenge. You challenge me, and I WILL come through. There’s no way to lose against me when there’s a challenge because I kick it up. Why can you not lose? Because I prevent myself from losing. I might not best you, but I sure won’t lose! You can’t say I’ve lowered myself at all or not done anything to push myself as long as my goal of beating this challenge of yours as possible.
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I got my second Rock Band drums in today! YAY! Now I can play StepMania w/ two people again! =D Ah is so coo’.

Second thing is that whenever Katie’s been coming back home for the last couple weeks now, we’ve been playing Age of Empires III. She asked me to install it in her laptop so I did that back in August, and I guess she’s gotten pretty good at it. I mean, her home city was at level 50 or something which is nearly impossible to get so she must’ve been playing a lot I thought.
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My blog is moving again, but this time the domain name will stay the same. The only thing that’s really changing is that we’re being upgraded to a new server. The upgrade really isn’t needed, but we’re gonna have to move anyway so why not now? Instead of 7TB/month of bandwidth, we’ll be getting unlimited. Instead of 360GB of storage space, we’re getting unlimited + 50GB, lol!

I read amazing article. It’s a real eye-opener.

Now I’d like to discuss good driving etiquette. If you’re one of those that likes to tail the back of my car while I’m going 80, you need to be slapped in the face for being a dumbass then go have someone explain to you have people get rear-ended or in collisions and how I do NOT want to have my one and only car total by your retarded driving. Stay the crap away from the back of my car, and I won’t randomly hit my breaks if I’m feelin’ angry, and it just started raining today after a long time. The roads are slick, and I sure as heck am not gonna depend on your breaks or your car trying to avoid mine.

It’s so weird. It’s like my car is magnetic. I stay a good amount away from the person in front of me with great regards to how fast I’m going and everyone else seems to be doing fine, but somehow people don’t realize that I’m not going fast because well, THERE’S A CAR BLOCKING MY WAY! A CAR THAT JUST HAPPENS TO BE IN FRONT OF ME ALSO GOING THE SAME FREAKIN’ SPEED I AM. Sheesh people. Learn to drive then get back on the road. Maybe I don’t have to keep examining my rear view mirror and compensate my breaking for your moronic driving skills.

– Kevin out,
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